So, here’s a new one I’ve been hearing with increased frequency from the conservative camp: “surrender date.” Pretty brilliant, if you look at it from the outside. The truth is that Republicans are a hundred times better than Democrats at manipulating (or finessing, if you prefer) language to get strong sentiments condensed into as few words as possible. It’s the fine art of advertising in its most perfect form.

A few of my favorites have always been “death tax,” “cut and run,” “tax and spend,” the complete and utter refusal to use the term “the Democratic party” and the complete redefinition of the word “liberal.” Each one of these examples shows the brilliance of the conservative copywriting machine. All the Democrats could come up with was “stay and pay,” and we saw how quickly that caught on…uh, like never.

Well, back to the point – the new buzzword floating around is “surrender date.” When it comes to loaded words, this phrase is a bomb, but it also has another layer behind it that I find linguistically interesting. Surrender happens because of loss, not the other way around. By introducing this word into the debate (if you want to call it that anymore), conservative wordsmiths are trying to force the implication that Democrats are orchestrating our defeat. But, what I hear behind the word is that we’d be surrendering because it’s already over.

You don’t surrender when you’re ahead. You do it when you’re down. In Iraq War Episode 1, we didn’t surrender. We left. “Leave date” leaves us with some dignity…which is I think the most we could ever hope to walk away with at this point. Instead, by introducing this language, the Republican political machine is surrendering the fact that we are beyond the possibility of a favorable resolution. Which is a first, because the only thing I’ve heard up until now is that “it’s just a flesh wound.”

I got slightly bored tonight (hey, it happens) and decided to play around with Illustrator. It’d been a while since I’d gotten my vector on. In a total free-association draw-fest, this is what I came up with…wonder if something was on my mind. Hmm. Anywho, I quite like for a first shot at cartooning.

[[Image:For Art/wandbaldie.jpg|200]]

[youtube]8HEjMhqC5sE[/youtube]

I don’t even know what to say…especially when it gets to the rapping. But, Colin Mochrie (my favorite Canadian), why oh why did you have to be involved in this? Jeezy Creezy. There are too many possibilities with this. Bush to Rove: “You’re Fired.” Huh? Rove: “I like ripping the tops off of animals.” Sherwood: “You like ‘em topless?” What?!? This segment is a fountain of fodder. So, here’s my advice. Hit the pause button, clear your schedule for the next 8 minutes, grab a pack of Orville Redenbacher and schedule an appointment with your therapist. Hit the play button and enjoy.

Did I miss something? Clearly I’ve fallen out of touch with Canadian politics. You see, Stockwell Day, a figure who can loosely be compared with goof balls like Pat Buchanan, and Australia’s Pauline Hansen, is apparently still around. He’s the most ridiculous anti-immigration, homophobic, right-wing conservative Christian politician Canada’s probably ever seen (correct me if I’m wrong). And while those political views are not unique, he has an uncanny ability to make a fool of himself and his party to boot.

“Day won the by-election on Sept. 11, 2000, arriving at his first news conference on a Jet Ski wearing a wetsuit,” states Wikipedia.org.

How bout this one: “In April it was reported that Day had approved the hiring of a private investigator to dig up dirt to smear the Liberals. After confirming that he had met the man on April 7, Day denied this on the 8th, claiming on the 9th that he had read of the meeting in the Globe and Mail and had assumed that it was correct.”

So, he finally “stepped aside” as leader of the National Alliance party in 2001 after all the fallout of the countless mishaps he seemed to be behind.

I guess none of this is particularly significant, other than the fact I assumed Stockwell had become merely a memory of wacky Canadian politics. But, knowing the Stephen Harper government, I guess it only makes sense that he would be back in power somehow. But seriously, Minister of Public Safety? If anything, put him in the PEI Ministry of Transport.

(PS This blurb is the result of my rudimentary understanding of Canadian politics, and should in no way be read in a manner that assumes I know what I’m talking about.)

I was just wandering through the Information Super Highway and stumbled across Tony Blair’s official Downing Street website. There was a variety of fascinating stuff on there, and it’s well designed and nicely laid out. But then I spotted a link to the Prime Minister’s podcast. Podcast? Is this the modern iteration of the President’s weekly radio address? (BTW, do any radio stations actually syndicate that? I’ve yet to find it on the dial.) Not only does it seem that he podcasts, Blair talks with other notable people. In this case, the guest is Bill Bryson, the famous humorist/travel writer/English language aficionado. Now, I haven’t had a chance to listen to this yet, but I’m hoping to tonight. You can beat me to it, though, by picking up the PM’s feed here: iTunes / Not iTunes.

Just heard the news. Here’s a link to the NYT story: DEMOCRATS TAKE SENATE.

It’s that time again. For you Oregonians, I hope you have already taken the opportunity to walk your ballot to the mailbox (like, by last Friday). If you haven’t, the drop-boxes are open until 8pm today. There’s one at Pioneer Courthouse Square.

For you non-Oregonians (and especially those in key states), today’s your day! As the Republicans are all atwitter about voting fraud, I suggest you test their limits of excitation by rousing every illegal immigrant, felon, zoo animal and dead person you know and take them all down to your friendly local polling place. There you can all vote, I suggest, several times. This is the only way to ensure that the paper-trail-less e-voting machines are guaranteed to record your vote correctly at least once.

Then go home, grab a cup of coffee and watch the results come in. If we all vote right, and all goes according to the secret plan, the Democrats will be back in the Hiz-ouse. Maybe even the Siz-nate too. However, I don’t want to count my donkeys before they hatch. We’ll just have to stay tuned.

But, remember, you have to vote first.

PS Please don’t take me seriously. Do vote, but only once. I was just kidding about all that other stuff.

In an article I came across on engadget.com, it was reported that Quebec has given up on electronic voting. Merci dieu for that. Apparently Quebec’s chief electoral officer, Marcel Blanchet, souviens what happened last time, when they used machines in 140 municipalities. Turns out, according to the article, that “went down like a bad plate of poutine, suffering from blackouts and transmission errors, resulting in unreliable results.”

Think, if they had used these machines in the ‘96 referendum, this could have been a story about the nation of Quebec turning down e-voting.

Turns out the Quebecers aren’t completely nuts.

I’m starting to get sick and tired of all this news of flaws and deficiencies in electronic voting machines. Everything from viruses to tampering to complicated procedures suggests to me that voting has become overly complicated. Granted, some paper ballot systems are broke (ahem, I’m looking at you Miami-Dade), but not all paper systems suffer the same inadequacies.

News today from the AP is reporting that Hart InterCivic machines in three Virginia cities fail to properly display the full name of the candidates on the voting summary screen. See here for the full story. Hart promises to have the problem resolved by “next fall.” Next fall? Are you freaking kidding me? They failed to notice this minor inconvenience this whole time? For god’s sake, who’s running this show?

Here’s how to vote in such a way that you don’t have to stand in line, you get near instantaneous results, and there’s as little margin for error as is humanly possible: vote by mail with a No. 2 pencil. We’ve done it this way in Oregon for years, and I’ve heard next to zilch in the way of complaints.

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Need I say more? Hot damn, this thing is finally going in the right direction. It is somewhat sad that the Dems aren’t winning any races on policies, but are instead riding the coat-tails of one of the juiciest scandals to come out of the GOP for a long time. So, I’m looking forward to having the right guys in control again. Keep your fingers crossed for the Senate. Right now it’s Dems 50, GOP 49 and 1 tie.